Top ten (13?) things Janet is doing in Heaven


  • 13. Sneaking out of the 7,432nd annual Syndergaard reunion.


  • 12. Trying to grab a satellite transponder so she can watch The Office.


  • 11. Watching her grandchildren with great joy


  • 10. Bringing orange slices to the Newcomers Potluck


  • 9. Explaining to the Clergy Review Board how a mainstream church could possibly ordain Charlie Schweitzer.


  • 8. Being punished for excessive giggling during Meditation Time with the Saints.


  • 7. Frolicking in the clouds


  • 6. Organizing a toga party for the Senior Prophets


  • 5. Verifying with Heaven officials that she has, in fact, ended up in the most fun of her eternal options


  • 4. Explaining to St. Peter that wearing pajamas to church is not a sign of disrespect, but rather a statement that she finds church as comforting and nurturing as her own bed.


  • 3. Sneaking a scotch or two with Melba in Angels 101


  • 2. Four words: Whoopee cushion for God


  • 1. Smiling and laughing with us.

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